Dance or Die
by Raven and Angel
Summary: A simple contest isn't all that it seems. Especially when three girls, one pyromaniac, one normal girl, and one videogame addict is hosting it.


Dance or Die

By: Raven

Inspired to me when I was sleeping... I was dreaming I won a DDR Blind Dance Tournament (you don't see your opponent), and my opponent was Ed and Roy from FMA. How weird...

One-shot!

-What!-

Roy was raising an eyebrow at the absurdness of the flier. "Lieutenant Hawkeye, tell me what this means!" He pointed at a random scribble at the bottom of the page.

Riza looked over his shoulder. "I believe that's a worm...That looks oddly like you."

Havoc snickered. Roy threatened to snap his fingers.

"Sorry sorry!" Havoc waved his hands apologetically.

"So...this competition in tomorrow then."

"That's what it says."

"What's the prize, a promotion? Women in miniskirts?" Roy asked. (Raven: -WHACKS ROY- PERV!)

"It doesn't say...But the person must either be very rich, or eccentric." Riza gave the notice another one over. "Ah...apparently what we have to do...is Dance. It's called 'Dance Dance Revolution'." Riza looked up. "I think we need _dance partners._" She gave 'Dance partners' emphasis.

Havoc and Roy exchanged nervous glances.

"Haven't you guys ever asked a girl out to a dance? The prom? School dances that ISN'T formal?" Riza asked, raising an eyebrow.

Roy and Havoc shook their heads, and then asked at the same time, "Will you come with me so I don't look like an idiot?"

"I asked first!" Roy shrieked.

"Forget it," Riza said, "I'm not going."

--

Becca, Liza, and Sammie-chan stood waiting, wondering if their ruse worked. Pulling a Rip Van Winkle left them incredibly hyperactive. Understandably, the two DDR freaks wanted to let loose some energy. Becca-chan stood nervous. She wasn't the best, but she was pretty good. Becca-chan was wondering about the two coolers of Gatorade and Powerade Sammie had to drink (Sammie: I DANCED FIVE HOURS STRAIGHT ONCE! TEN BOTTLES OF GATORADE! HAHAHAHAHA!)

"Think they'll come?" Liza asked.

"They will. I left a special flier in Roy's office."

"What? Really? A miniskirt?" Becca asked.  
"I'm not a perv."

"Ok, what then, Sammie-chan?"

"I drew a worm that looked like him and left a finger puppet with a goatee and mustache. It was the Roy puppet." Sammie looked proud. "Oh, here they come! Let's run up the machines!"

Indeed, a troop of Military people in blue came up the side of the large house. "X-box and DDR championships here we come!"

Roy was quite happy. He saw a large house in the distance. Riza was right. The person must be very rich to host a competition for the military. He still wondered if Riza would accept his offer to be his dance partner. Nerves, I tell you.

Note the sarcasm.

Riza begrudgingly came along, just to see some of the Military people make fools of themselves. It was oddly funny. They saw a large digital billboard as they approached the house. "DDR COMPETITION HERE!" it announced, then, "SPECTATORS ALLOWED! PARTY AFTERWARD!" A large group of people were crowding around the entrance.

Roy took command. "MILITARY COMING THROUGH! MOVE IT ALONG!" The crowd shifted trying to get a look. Ed and Al hid in the middle of the crowd. The crowd shifted like living water. Mustang proudly took his place at the head, and marched through the doors.

"We're here!" He announced.

"JESUS CHRIST MUSTANG! WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?" A voice snapped. Female. Young. A head popped out, with dark brown hair, and crazy brown eyes. "Being in the military I thought you would've come faster!"

"Sammie-chan! Are they here! BECAUSE YOU'RE YELLING AGAIN!" A voice shrieked.

"Yeah, they're here, Liza!" Sammie called back up.

"Lead them up then!"

Sammie looked at Roy and the piling military in the doorway. "Yeah, I'd better. All right, follow me, and touch anything I'll blow you to bits with my blowtorch and flamethrower. Capiche? Good." Sammie pulled a green stick out, but with a 3x Starlite scope attached, and a trigger. The girl marched ahead. Ed and Al finally broke out of the sweaty military body horde.

"Hey, girl, what's the competition for?"

"For?" She turned around. "Because we're bored that's why! In addition, because we pulled a Rip Van Winkle. So...We—" She stopped. "Come on, they're waiting!"

Sammie ran up the flight of stairs, and Ed followed, with Al and Roy close behind. "Hurry up! You'll never catch up!" The girl laughed, and ran even faster on the stairs.

"Damn girl," Ed muttered. The girl holstered her flamethrower, and focused on Ed.

"What did you say?" The girl's finger squeezed the trigger, and a click sounded. The first trigger guard.

"Uh...nothing!" Ed looked away. He didn't want to be burned to a crisp. The girl sounded psychotic.

"Well, then Tweedledee and Tweedledum, hurry it up!" The girl motioned to Roy and Riza. "You guys move so slow it's like you're married." She paused. "Are you?"

"No!" Roy barked.

"Oh. Come on then. About there." Sammie walked the last of the stairs, and they came up to the second floor. "We're here, Becca and Liza!" Two more girls' heads poked out the side of the wall, one with black hair, the other with brown hair and blond highlights.

"Great! Let the fun begin!" All three girls charged down the stairs. "Come on! You'll never catch up!"

"Why'd you make us climb the stairs when we have to go downstairs?" Ed screamed. They stopped. Then they turned and shrugged, and Ed could really see what they looked like. Each one of them wore workout pants, and those training bra-things that most women wear when they work out, and their hair were let down. Sammie with the blowtorch had black, with flames, Liza was the one with black hair was silver with blue waves, and Becca was white with gold lightning.

"Dunno." All three of them said. "But you're missing the point. If one of you wins the competition, you get to choose your prize. And no, Ed, we're not going to...Well," one of them turned around to whisper with the other three.

"We could replace his arms and legs if he pulls a Rip Van Winkle," Becca whispered.

"Wouldn't work, we have prosthetic limbs. And I think he's rather fond of his automail now," Sammie whispered. She turned. "Just follow us if you wanna win something good." That convinced them, and they charged along.

_10 minutes later..._

"Alright guys! This is the place! Ready?" Liza announced.

A resounding applause. "Alright!" Becca, Liza, and Sammie pushed open the heavy oaken doors. "Welcome to our Paradise!" The three girls led them in. A garden took place in on side, with a river cutting the room in half. A bridge arched over it. To the left, were video games, and DDR machines, and everything you could think of. To the back was a mini zoo, and with a wall separating, a gym.

The girls rushed to the video game side. "Over here is where the competition will take place!" She motioned to the east wall, "And those, people, are your fans!" A wall became transparent, and scores of people were cheering, and waving flags with their favorite person on it. Half of the girls had either Roy or Ed, and the boys held mostly Riza, and Liza.

Roy was awed. He waved. The girls stood up. They were wearing black miniskirts. Havoc had a nosebleed. Sammie motioned for them to sit down. One wore a shirt that said "I (heart) Roy!" Sammie snickered.

"Well, guys, we've decided who your opponents are. Ed, you'll be against Becca, Roy, you're against me, Riza, and you're against me too, Al, you're against Liza, Havoc you're with Liza, Armstrong, you're with Becca (sorry Becca-chan)..." Sammie rolled off a list of names. Unfortunately, for Roy, he was going up against the best of the three (sorry Liza and Becca!).

He grinned proudly, and then stepped onto a large metal platform, with the four cardinal arrows. Sammie did the same. "Right," she said, "Rules. Arrows go up the screen, when they hit that thing, press on the arrow with the correct arrow and you'll score points. Try to keep up and you just might win," Sammie sounded smug. "Well, I'll pick the first song."

"Wait, you mean we don't have dance partners?" Roy interrupted.

"Dance partners!" Sammie sounded horrified. "Of course not! Ever played DDR?"

"No."

"Stupid."

A Roy fangirl shrieked. And tried to tackle Sammie. Sammie burned her to a crisp with her flamethrower. Roy looked on.

"Let's do...Barbie Girl!" Sammie picked a song.

"Go Sam!" Liza and Becca cheered. They knew she only chose this song because it was funny and she burned all her Barbie's when she was in second grade.

Roy paled. A skimpily dressed girl was dancing in the background. Arrows moved. Roy barely moved. Sammie, however, was moving like mad.

Too bad for Roy.

Did I say Roy? I mean, too bad for the Roy _fangirls_.

Sammie beat him after several humiliating attempts at combos. The Ed fangirls screamed and cheered, the Roy fangirls shrieked and were blown away by the flamethrower. Haha. I laugh. Well, maybe not after I get the Roy, Ed, Al, Riza, Havoc, Winry, and the FMA cast plushies for me, Becca-chan, and Liza-chan. I'm such a nice person, Sam thought.

Riza was up next. She lost gallantly on Hysteria, Standard Mode. Did I mention Barbie Girl was on Light mode? Riza got third place on the high-scores, before Becca-chan, but after Liza and Sammie.

"Good job, Riza," Sammie shook Riza's hand.

"Likewise."

Sammie moved on to Roy. "Cheer up. You'll get a participation gift."

Roy's head shot up. "What?"  
Sammie handed him a book.

The cover read, "A Guide to Women: To Understand Their Psychology and to Have a Fun Interactive Relationship." Roy paled.

"You're kidding," he said.

"Nope." Sammie smiled. "Hook up with Riza. Half of the stories fangirls write are about, 'A new Fire/Flame Alchemist comes to town, and she has a dark past that may prove to destroy the world. Will Roy and the others help her? Will Roy fall in love? RoyxOC.' And the OC's are way bitches. So, get up with Riza, and you'll make the rest of us happy, and who knows? You guys may pull a Rip Van Winkle in a few months." Roy crinkled up the side of his face. "Better than facing your fangirls. They're rabid. Trust me. I used you be an 'Ed and Roy Fangirl'...but..." Sammie shrugged. "I discovered a new passion—Artemis Fowl. Super genius."

Sammie moved away, leaving Roy to ponder his thoughts. "Thanks!" He called.

In the end, the Military lost, leaving the victors Sammie, Becca-chan, and Liza-chan to hand out gifts. Roy got a miniskirt. Riza got a rifle with a 10x Starlite scope, and a full set of new guns. Havoc also got a miniskirt, and Roy kept his book hidden. Armstrong got a whack on the head, and some fruit. The rest got whacks in the shins for being lousy DDR players. Ed got money, and a book called 'Artemis Fowl, Artemis Fowl: The Arctic Incident, Artemis Fowl: The Eternity Code, and Artemis Fowl: The Opal Deception' book set. Al got an art set. The grand prize ended up being the actual east and west wing of the mansion, eventually given to Roy, Riza, Ed and Al.

"Well, see you guys later! Well, Roy, Ed, Al, and Riza and Havoc anyway. Bye guys!" Sammie waved bye. Roy growled, and Becca-chan laughed.

He looked idiotic with his face covered in lipstick stains. Riza was snickering to herself. The military guests trooped off.

But the three girls had more in mind than a simple Rip Van Winkle.

-End-

Hope they weren't too OOC. Yeah, not alot of talking, but in the sequel there will be.

Hints: Bolgna, Barbies, alchohol, and singing. Lots and lots of singing.


End file.
